My Love for Unemployed Skeletor

Not 'love' in a dirty way, but love in the sense of sheer joy.

Those of you who know me know that the last year or so hasn't exactly been good for me and mine. But, I was able to persevere. Largely because I believe that your sense of humor plays into your sense of everythings-gonna-be-okay.

So, without further ado - let me take my hat off to Unemployed Skeletor.



I could be having the worst day in the world, and watching the dance-contest-video, the return-of-the-mack video, and/or the skeleton-of-love video can always put a smile on my face, no matter how many times I've seen them before.

Not to mention that you've vicariously introduced me to the joy that is IHOP's Rooty-Tooty-Fresh-and-Fruity. It's as fun to say as it is to eat!

Mr. Kevin Conn, you are a genius, and I salute you. Thank you for using your humor to make this world less crappy. It's primarily because of you, and Chris Sims at The-ISB, that I decided to make this blog - to try and add a little humor and a little levity to a world that I personally know can really, really use it.

THANK YOU.

My Imaginary Band

This post was prompted by Chris Sims' genius article regarding the G.I. Joe Killaz, in which he references that (much like me) he is one of the guys in their mid, ok, late twenties, who spend an inordinate amount of time coming up with good band names.

While years back I'd begun a screenplay involving a band called 'My Balls,' led by frontman 'Ozzy Balls,' and whose debut and sophomore albums would be referred to as 'My Balls' and 'Your Balls,' respectively (the latter of which featuring the single 'In Charge of My Balls,' and the album's marketing campaign would consist of Ozzy Balls saying, "I couldn't live without My Balls, can you live without - 'Your Balls?') - this is simply too many ball references in one joke for it to hold up. (These are the kind of things you can ONLY learn by trial and error.)

As luck would have it, I came upon the perfect band name when at an old job where I (gasp) processed medical claims. That name?

GRAVENSTEIN.



A portmanteau of 'grave' and 'frankenstein,' Gravenstein would be a monster-themed metal-ish band, the likes of White Zombie meets something even awesomer than White Zombie. They'd all be in monster-character, would be led by Dr. Gravenstein, and their album would be titled, 'Dr. Gravenstein, I Presume?'

But back to the G.I. Joe Killaz. While I don't know the whole of their work, I can say that the haunting melodies of Eau De Cobra may well drive a straight man to ransack the perfume counter of the nearest Macy's in the hopes for the merest whiff of it. (This is a good thing.)

While Eau De Cobra was a brainwash perfume that fell into Cobra's hands, (to make Baroness irresistible to men) I really feel like it might've just been a placebo. Making a leathery-spandex-clad-hot-evil-librarian-vamp-dominatrix-with-a-mean-streak attractive to my adolescent mind would've taken about 0% secret-brainwash-perfume. 

Oh Baroness, if you'd only come a-calling...